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Transcript

6 voices: Eden; Kyla; Mr Mackenzie; Professor Curran; Thrace; SUSIE

Scene 1

[Children playing]

EDEN: Kyla, Kyla!

KYLA: What do you want?

EDEN: Will you sit with me on the bus?

KYLA: We’ve talked about this, Eden. You’ve got to sit with kids your own age.

EDEN: But …

KYLA: No buts. Now, where’s your bag? Mum’ll be livid if you lose that. It’s got your lunch in it.

EDEN: Fine … it’s over by Mr Mackenzie.

KYLA: Well, go and get it. We’ll be leaving in any minute.

MR MACKENZIE: Right, children. I need you to line up now. The bus is here to take us to the castle. Those of you who’ve been before will need to pair up with someone who hasn’t, please.

EDEN: Please, Kyla. We’ve got to pair up. I haven’t been before.

KYLA: Fine. Just don’t annoy me, OK?

Scene 2

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace! Thrace! Where are you?

THRACE: Coming, Your Magnificence!

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace!

THRACE: Here, Your Magnificence.

PROF. CURRAN: Ah. There you are. Right. Have you calibrated the temporal stabilisers with the flux capacitor power crystals so that we can action a shift in the continuum?

[Squeaky noise]

THRACE: Um. What?

PROF. CURRAN: Have you fixed the time machine?

THRACE: Oh, yes. The time machine is fixed.

PROF. CURRAN: Excellent. Now it’s time for us to put Operation Stopwatch into action.

THRACE: Brilliant! Just one quick question …

PROF. CURRAN: Yes?

THRACE: What is Operation Stopwatch?

PROF. CURRAN: For the thousandth time, Operation Stopwatch is my masterplan to move through time, changing the course of Scotland’s history, forever!

[Clanging]

THRACE: Ah, that Operation Stopwatch.

Scene 3

EDEN: So, where are we going then? What’s this castle?

KYLA: This is the annual school trip to Culzean Castle. You only get to go if you’re in certain years.

EDEN: What’s so interesting about a boring old castle?

KYLA: It’s not boring! There’s lots to do there.

EDEN: I’d rather be back at school playing football.

KYLA: Well, that’s probably better. I wouldn’t want you to get scared.

EDEN: I wouldn’t get scared! Scared of what?

KYLA: Oh, just the ghosts.

EDEN: Ghosts? You never said there were ghosts!

KYLA: Well, you’re more interested in football, so I didn’t think you’d be up for meeting any ghosts.

EDEN: I am SO up for meeting ghosts. I love ghosts. I’ve always loved ghosts.

KYLA: Well, if you’re quiet for the rest of the journey, you may get to meet some when we get to the castle!

EDEN: But … !

KYLA: But only if you’re quiet.

EDEN: Mmmmmmm.

KYLA: That’s better. Now, don’t say anything until we get there.

Scene 4

THRACE: Trouble! There’s trouble, Your Magnificence. Trouble! Trouble!

PROF. CURRAN: What are you talking about, you fool?

THRACE: Trouble!

PROF. CURRAN: Where?

THRACE: There.

PROF. CURRAN: Where?

THRACE: There!

PROF. CURRAN: What? 

[Confused noises]

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace …

THRACE: Yes, Your Supreme Wonderfulness.

PROF. CURRAN: What is the trouble?

THRACE: Well, there appears to be – and I’m only trying to give you the heads-up here – a bus full of …

PROF. CURRAN: Yes?

THRACE: Well, what are they called? Those small things …

[Dramatic music]

PROF. CURRAN: (gasps) Elves!

THRACE: No, not shelves. You know, the little things. They’re really annoying. They go to school, eat sweets …

PROF. CURRAN: Children!

THRACE: That’s it, Your Splendiferousness. Children! You really are clever. Th-that’s why you’re the boss.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace, there are not meant to be any children at the castle today. It is meant to be closed.

THRACE: Well, according to the schedule they’ve opened especially for the school. That’s why I came running up and shouting ‘Trouble! Trouble! Trouble!’

PROF. CURRAN: Yes, yes, well, well. This means we will have to step up our plans for Operation Stopwatch.

THRACE: Excellent! Now, what was that again?

PROF. CURRAN: (tuts) Fool.

Scene 5

EDEN: Woah! This place is so cool. Look at it, Kyla – it’s huge!

KYLA: Better than playing football?

EDEN: Much better.

MR MACKENZIE: Right, children – don’t wander too far away. We’ll be meeting our guide soon.

KYLA: Make sure you’ve … Eden? Eden! Eden! Come back here!

[Running footsteps]

Scene 6

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace!

THRACE: Yes, Your Majesticals?

PROF. CURRAN: Are we up to full power yet?

THRACE: Very nearly.

PROF. CURRAN: Well, hurry up. We’re going to be late.

THRACE: How can we be late? We’re going back in time.

PROF. CURRAN: Are you arguing with me?

THRACE: (gulps) Absolutely not.

PROF. CURRAN: I didn’t think you would be. Now, give the machine as much power as you can.

THRACE: Which machine?

PROF. CURRAN: The time machine, you fool!

THRACE: Oh yes, that machine.

[Clicking lever]

Scene 7

[Creaking door]

KYLA: Eden? Eden? Where are you? You’re in so much trouble when I find you.

EDEN: Boo!

KYLA: Argh! Eden, why did you run off like that?

EDEN: I wanted to see the castle.

KYLA: We’ve got to get back before the rest of them realise we’re not there. 

EDEN: Or … we could go exploring on our own. Look! There’s a door.

KYLA: So?

EDEN: Doors are meant to be opened!

KYLA: No, Eden. Some doors are meant to be shut, locked, never opened and walked away from. This one especially.

EDEN: Why this one?

KYLA: Because it says ‘Do Not Open’ on it, in big red letters.

EDEN: Yeah, but grown-ups are always saying things like ‘Don’t do this’, ‘Don’t touch that’, ‘Stop playing with it, you’ll break it’. They don’t really mean it. Come on!

KYLA: They do mean it. Eden!

[Creaking door]

EDEN: Kyla, it’s a staircase.

KYLA: Great, a really old staircase. Let’s go!

EDEN: I’m going to have a look.

KYLA: Eden, no! Eden, you’re going to get us in so much trouble.

EDEN: It’s really dark.

KYLA: Well, what does that tell you?

EDEN: That the lights aren’t on?

KYLA: No, it means that we’re not meant to be in here.

EDEN: Hang on, I think I can see some light. It’s right down at the bottom.

[Footsteps and water dripping]

KYLA: Eden, can you hear that?

EDEN: What?

KYLA: I’m not sure. It sounds like some sort of machine.

EDEN: Oh yeah, I can hear it too. Maybe it’s the ghosts!

KYLA: Don’t be silly! There’s no such thing as ghosts.

EDEN: But you said … 

KYLA: Shhhhhh! Look!

[Electrical buzzing]

EDEN: What?

KYLA: Woah! Look at that! It’s like some sort of secret underground lair. Whose do you think it is?

EDEN: It might be Batman’s?

KYLA: Batman isn’t Scottish! And anyway, he lives in Gotham.

EDEN: Oh yeah.

KYLA: Look, there’s somebody coming. Quick, hide!

EDEN: Where?

KYLA: Anywhere! Just hide. Look, there’s a desk. Let’s hide under there.

THRACE: So, remind me why are we travelling back in time again?

PROF. CURRAN: I shall explain this only once more to you, Thrace. We are travelling back in time to a number of different locations to alter the course of Scottish history. I have a fool-proof plan to bring about changes that will make me the ruler of all of Scotland. If I have to explain it to you once more, I shall take you so far back in time you’ll meet the dinosaurs.

THRACE: Did Scotland have dinosaurs?

KYLA: Of course Scotland had dinosaurs! Didn’t you learn that in school?

THRACE: Argh!

EDEN: Kyla, what are you doing?

PROF. CURRAN: Children! Thrace! Grab them!

THRACE: Come here!

KYLA and EDEN: Argh!

PROF. CURRAN: Grab them, Thrace!

THRACE: They’re so fast! I can’t catch up with them! Come here!

EDEN: Get off me! Get off me!

KYLA: Stop it! Let us go!

EDEN: Let us go immediately.

THRACE: Or what?

KYLA: Or we’ll tell our teacher about all the horrible things you’re doing.

THRACE: Um, boss?

PROF. CURRAN: What?

THRACE: Should I let them go? They said they would tell if I didn’t.

PROF. CURRAN: Of course not, you fool.

THRACE: But I don’t want to get in any trouble with a teacher.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace, you can get into trouble with a teacher or you can get into trouble with me.

THRACE: Fair enough. You two are going nowhere.

PROF. CURRAN: How did you two get in?

KYLA: We came down the stairs.

PROF. CURRAN: [mocking repeat] What? Through the door that says ‘Do Not Open’?

EDEN: Yes.

THRACE: I told you we should have put a lock on it.

PROF. CURRAN: Silence, you fool!

THRACE: Sorry.

PROF. CURRAN: Tell me, how much of my plan did you hear?

KYLA and EDEN: Nothing!

THRACE: So, you’re saying you didn’t hear anything about the plan for the Professor to go back to various points in Scotland’s history using our time machine device, and change the course of events so that eventually the Professor could rule all of Scotland?

KYLA and EDEN: Um, no?

THRACE: Phew! No problem then, boss – they don’t know anything.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace?

THRACE: Yep?

PROF. CURRAN: Shut up!

THRACE: Righto.

PROF. CURRAN: I don’t have time to deal with you two now. I need to make a start on Operation Stopwatch.

THRACE: Careful, boss – you don’t want to give away the plan!

PROF. CURRAN: So, you two will stay here until we get back. Then I will transport you back in time and leave you stranded where you can do no harm. Ha ha ha ha!

THRACE: Ha ha ha ha ha!

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace, what are you doing?

THRACE: Joining in in the evil villain laughter?

PROF. CURRAN: Well, don’t!

THRACE:  Sorry.

PROF. CURRAN: Fetch me the time machine remotes. One for me and one for you.

THRACE: Time machine remotes. On it!

PROF. CURRAN: I will make the final preparations and then nothing can stop us. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

KYLA: (whispers) Eden?

EDEN:  Yes?

KYLA: I think I can get free. We’ve got to stop these two from changing history. If we don’t, then all my homework will be wrong!

EDEN: How are we going to stop them?

KYLA: I’m going to steal the remotes so they can’t use the machine.

EDEN: OK, can you untie me as well, please?

KYLA: Yes, but don’t look like you’re free. Hold still.

THRACE: Right, I’ve got the remote, boss. How do they work?

PROF. CURRAN: They are pre-programmed with all the destinations and dates that we need to travel back to in order for my plan to work. And just for you, Thrace, I have loaded onto the device the entire knowledge of everything in history, to help you blend in. Just press that button and ask it a question. Watch. SUSIE, is Thrace unbelievably stupid?

SUSIE: Yes, Thrace is unbelievably stupid.

THRACE: Wow! This thing is good. I am unbelievably stupid. Why’s it called SUSIE?

PROF. CURRAN: It stands for Supremely Upgraded Subspace Information Engine. SUSIE for short. It knows everything there is to know about anything.

THRACE: So, which button do you press to time travel?

PROF. CURRAN: The big green one there.

THRACE: Ah! The one that says Time Travel on it?

PROF. CURRAN: I’ve made it so simple that a monkey can use it.

THRACE: I certainly can.

PROF. CURRAN: Right, you meddling children. I shall see you later on.

KYLA: Now, Eden!

THRACE: Hey! Give that back! It’s mine!

PROF. CURRAN: No, stop! Come on!

THRACE: Give me it! Come here you!

KYLA: Eden, come on. Let’s run!

PROF. CURRAN: After them!

Scene 8

EDEN: Kyla, we’ve got nowhere left to run. We’re trapped.

PROF. CURRAN: Ha! Indeed, you are. So, hand over the device and I might let you live.

KYLA: You’re wrong.

PROF. CURRAN: Oh really? And why is that then?

KYLA: Hold on tight to me, Eden.

EDEN: Why? What are you going to do?

KYLA: Either something really brave or really stupid. There’s one more place to go. We’re not entirely trapped.

PROF. CURRAN: And where do you think you can go then?

KYLA: The past!

PROF. CURRAN: What?

[Whooshing]

THRACE: Where did they go?

PROF. CURRAN: They’ve gone back in time. I don’t believe it! This is why I hate children. They always ruin everything.

THRACE: What are we going to do, boss?

PROF. CURRAN: We are going to follow them through time and get that device back. Then we’re going to make them wish they’d never messed with us. Thrace, come here!

THRACE: Righto.

PROF. CURRAN: Hold on tight. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.

[Whooshing]

Transcript

6 voices: Announcer; Eden; Kyla; Professor Curran; Thrace; SUSIE

ANNOUNCER: Previously on Timesliders ...

KYLA: Woah! Look at that! It’s like some sort of secret underground lair.

THRACE: So, remind me: why are we travelling back in time again?

PROF. CURRAN: Operation Stopwatch is my masterplan to move through time, changing the course of Scotland’s history, forever!

KYLA: We’ve got to stop these two from changing history. If we don’t, then all my homework will be wrong!

PROF. CURRAN: SUSIE, is Thrace unbelievably stupid?

SUSIE: Yes, Thrace is unbelievably stupid.

THRACE: Wow! This thing is good. I am unbelievably stupid. Why’s it called SUSIE?

PROF. CURRAN: It stands for Supremely Upgraded Subspace Information Engine. SUSIE for short. It knows everything there is to know about anything.

KYLA: Hold on tight to me, Eden.

EDEN: Why? What are you going to do?

KYLA: Either something really brave or really stupid. There’s one more place to go. We’re not entirely trapped.

PROF. CURRAN: And where do you think you can go then?

KYLA: The past!

PROF. CURRAN: What?

[Whooshing]

THRACE: Where did they go?

PROF. CURRAN: They’ve gone back in time. I don’t believe it! This is why I hate children. They always ruin everything.

THRACE: What are we going to do, boss?

PROF. CURRAN: We are going to follow them through time and get that device back. Then we’re going to make them wish they’d never messed with us. Thrace, come here!

THRACE: Righto.

PROF. CURRAN: Hold on tight. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.

[Whooshing]

ANNOUNCER: And now, on Timesliders ...

Scene 1

[Whooshing]

EDEN: Where … where are we?

KYLA: Did you see what happened? I just saw a big flash of light and it was like I was falling through a tunnel. Then somehow, we ended up here.

EDEN: Wherever here is. Kyla, look, there’s nothing here. It’s just snow, ice and rocks. It’s so cold. Good job Mum made us wear our huge coats.

KYLA: Have you still got your gloves and hat in your pocket?

EDEN: Um … yep!

KYLA: Put them on or you’ll freeze.

EDEN: What are we going to do, Kyla? Where are we?

KYLA: I don’t know. But we can’t stay out here. It’s too cold.

EDEN: Well, where do we go then? I can’t see anything at all.

KYLA: Hang on. I’ve got an idea. Have you still got that time-travelling thing?

EDEN: Yep.

KYLA: Give it here. SUSIE, where are we?

SUSIE: You are currently in the part of Scotland known as the Highlands, more specifically Glencoe.

KYLA: What? I’ve been to Glencoe and it doesn’t look anything like this. What’s happened to it?

SUSIE: The glen has not been formed as we have arrived in a time period pre-dating the melting of the glaciers.

KYLA and EDEN: What?!

SUSIE: This is the first stop on Professor Curran’s Operation Stopwatch.

KYLA: So, when are we?

SUSIE: That’s a much better question. About 10,000 BC. I can’t be more precise, I’m afraid.

KYLA: Why would Professor Curran need to come here?

SUSIE: That information is not available to me, I’m afraid. However, I should inform you that another time-travel device is about to arrive at this location.

KYLA: Oh no! The Professor. Quick, Eden. We need to hide.

EDEN: Where? There’s nothing here.

KYLA: Um, quick! Behind that rock over there! Don’t make a sound.

[Whooshing]

Scene 2

THRACE: Argh!

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace! What are you doing?

THRACE: Argh! I’m screaming!

PROF. CURRAN: Why?

THRACE: Because I’m scared. That was awful. I’m not sure if I like time travel.

PROF. CURRAN: Well, that’s no problem. I can just leave you here!

THRACE: No! Please don’t do that. Although … where is here?

PROF. CURRAN: You’re in the Highlands.

THRACE: It doesn’t look like the Highlands to me.

PROF. CURRAN: That’s because it hasn’t been formed yet. We have arrived in about 10,000 BC, just as all this ice is starting to melt. When it’s finished, in a few thousand years’ time, it will leave what you and I know as Glencoe.

THRACE: (shivering) Oh. So why are we here then?

PROF. CURRAN: Because, my pea-brained sidekick, I don’t want the ice to melt slowly. I want it to melt quickly. Now, come along. We’ve got to set off the thermo-grenades at key points in the glacier.

THRACE: Righto, boss. Oh, boss?

PROF. CURRAN: What is it, Thrace?

THRACE: What about the two kids? Kyla and Eden. Don’t we need to find them?

PROF. CURRAN: Ha! The harsh desolate landscape of the ice age will take care of them. Look around, Thrace. Nothing could survive out here.

THRACE: (shivering) G-g-good point.

[Crunching footsteps in snow]

Scene 3

EDEN: Why would the Professor want to melt the ice quickly? How is that going to help with Operation Stopwatch?

KYLA: I don’t know, but it can’t be good.

EDEN: Hang on. Let’s ask SUSIE. SUSIE, what’s an ice age?

SUSIE: An ice age is a long period of time when the Earth’s temperature is much colder than normal. In 10,000 BC, the Earth started to warm up and the ice sheets were melting. By 8000 BC, the ice sheets in this area had disappeared, and Glencoe was left.

EDEN: Woah! So that’s why it looks like that. 

SUSIE: That’s right. The ice would carve out the U-shape that you know from Glencoe. It took a glacier, which is a big body of ice, over 12km in size to create Glencoe.

EDEN: 12km? That’s huge! So, why would the Professor want to melt the ice quickly?

SUSIE: What happens to ice when it melts?

EDEN: Oh! It turns to water.

SUSIE: Correct! What happens when over 12km of ice melts?

EDEN: Oh, oh! Lots of water!

SUSIE: Correct again. What happens when over 12km of ice melts all at once?

KYLA and EDEN: Floods!

SUSIE: I suspect that the Professor is trying to use the ice of the glacier to cause a flood.

EDEN: But why? There’s nothing here.

KYLA: There might not be anything where we are, but what about other places in Scotland? SUSIE, when did people start living in Scotland?

SUSIE: Early settlers would have existed in Scotland from approximately 12,000 BC.

KYLA: So, the Professor is going to try and use the ice age’s glaciers to flood the settlers.

EDEN: Well, that’s not very nice! What if they can’t swim?

SUSIE: And Glencoe isn’t the only place to have been formed by a glacier. Most of Scotland and the north of England would have been covered in them.

KYLA: We have to stop them from melting them all at once!

EDEN: How are we going to do that?

KYLA: I think I have a plan. But we’ve got to follow them. Quick, let’s go!

Scene 4

PROF. CURRAN: Put the first one there. 

[Clanking and beeping]

PROF. CURRAN: Excellent. Now, we’ve got another long walk to plant the next one. If this works, we can do this all over Scotland!

THRACE: Yippee.

PROF. CURRAN: Problem, Thrace?

THRACE: No, Your Magnificence, it’s just …

PROF. CURRAN: Just what?

THRACE: Well, it’s very cold and there’s lots of ice and snow everywhere, and I didn’t bring my wellies. I’ve got cold feet!

PROF. CURRAN: Oh. Well, that’s your own fault. Now, stop your whining or I’ll leave you behind, and you can see how well you can swim when I melt 12km of ice in one go!

THRACE: Actually, I’m not that cold anymore.

PROF. CURRAN: I didn’t think so.

THRACE: How are we going to set these thermo what-do-ya-call-ems off then, boss?

PROF. CURRAN: Once all five of them are planted, I will use this remote to detonate all of them at once. They will act like microwaves and heat all the ice in a matter of seconds.

THRACE: I should have brought my surfboard!

PROF. CURRAN: Come on, we’ve got to set the next one.

Scene 5

[Beeping]

KYLA: Here’s the first one they’ve planted. SUSIE, what is it?

SUSIE: This is a remote thermo-grenade. When all five of them are planted at specific locations, they will be able to be remotely detonated, and the ice will melt in a matter of seconds.

KYLA: How do we stop them?

EDEN: I think it’s got some sort of switch on the bottom …

KYLA: Eden!

EDEN: What?

KYLA: Be careful! You could blow us all up!

EDEN: Look, there’s an on/off switch on the bottom of it, right next to these flashing red lights.

KYLA: Give it here.

EDEN: Flick the switch and turn it off.

KYLA: OK. Here it goes …

[Click, and beeping fades away]

EDEN: Is that it?

KYLA: I think so. Bring it with us. We don’t want to leave anything out here that isn’t supposed to be.

EDEN: They went this way. Quick! I found another one!

[Click]

KYLA: How many is that now?

EDEN: Four.

KYLA: So, there’s one more left. Come on. Look, I can see them up ahead. Careful, Eden, don’t get too close.

Scene 6

PROF. CURRAN: One more device to plant and then we shall retreat to a safe distance to watch the first part of my plan work perfectly.

THRACE: Righto, boss – here we go. 

[Clanking and beeping]

THRACE: All done!

PROF. CURRAN: Excellent. Now, follow me, Thrace. We need to get well away from here.

KYLA: Not so fast, Professor!

PROF. CURRAN: Ugh, that’s all I need. Meddling children getting in my way. You’re too late. The devices have all been planted and there’s nothing you can do to stop them.

THRACE: Yeah! Unless you switch them off, there’s nothing you can do! 

[Confused noises]

THRACE: Oh, sorry.

PROF. CURRAN: You fool! No matter, she’ll have to get through me first.

THRACE: Boss …

PROF. CURRAN: You don’t have it in you, little girl. Do you really think that someone like you can take on someone like me and win?

THRACE: Boss …

PROF. CURRAN: You’ll never stop Operation Stopwatch. Ha! I mean, you’re nothing but a child.

THRACE: Boss!

PROF. CURRAN: What is it, Thrace?

THRACE: Weren’t there two of them?

PROF. CURRAN: Ah.

EDEN: That’s right. There were. And I’ve found the last grenade.

[Click]

PROF. CURRAN: What? Quick, Thrace – pass me the remote detonator.

THRACE: Here, boss.

[Whooshing and frantic clicking]

PROF. CURRAN: Why isn’t anything happening?

THRACE: I think they found the off switch, boss.

KYLA: That’s right. So, your plan is ruined and you’ll never be able to rule Scotland!

PROF. CURRAN: Ha! You think this was the only part of my plan? I have plenty of other ways to take my rightful place as ruler. Just you wait and see. Thrace, pass me the thunder wobbler.

[Dramatic music]

THRACE: Not the … thunder wobbler!

PROF. CURRAN: Yes! The thunder wobbler!

THRACE: If you’re sure …

PROF. CURRAN: Let’s see how these pesky oiks cope with this! Come on, Thrace. Let’s leave these two to perish.

[Whirring]

THRACE: Good plan, boss.

PROF. CURRAN: So long! Enjoy your final moments …

Scene 7

KYLA: Well, we stopped the ice from melting but I think we’ve got a new problem.

EDEN: What is it?

KYLA: It looks like a big stick. Can you feel that? It feels like a very small earthquake.

EDEN: Quick! Ask SUSIE.

KYLA: SUSIE, what’s a thunder wobbler?

SUSIE: Oh dear. Oh my. The thunder wobbler is a device that sends vibrations and shockwaves deep into the earth. If you don’t stop it, the ice sheet could split and cause a catastrophic avalanche.

EDEN: What are we going to do?

KYLA: I’ve got an idea, but it might not work.

EDEN: What?

KYLA: We could use one of Professor Curran’s grenades to blow the machine up.

EDEN: How? We haven’t got the remote.

SUSIE: I think I have a plan that might work.

KYLA: Quick, SUSIE. The rumblings are getting stronger.

[Whirring and pulsing gets faster]

SUSIE: If you open up the grenade, you’ll find a ‘Detonate Now’ button. If you press that, you won’t need a remote.

KYLA: But we’ll be detonated with it!

SUSIE: I didn’t say it was a perfect plan …

KYLA: What if we time travel out of here at exactly the same time as we detonate the grenade? We might just make it away from the blast!

SUSIE: That could work.

KYLA: It’s our only option. Otherwise, we’ll get buried under the ice for thousands of years!

[Whirring and pulsing gets faster]

EDEN: OK, let’s do it.

KYLA: Look, there’s the button. Ready?

EDEN: Ready!

KYLA: SUSIE?

SUSIE: Ready!

[Click]

KYLA: Here goes nothing!

[Explosion]

[Whooshing, then ticking clocks]

EDEN: Um … Kyla?

KYLA: Yeah?

EDEN: Where are we?

KYLA: I don’t know. SUSIE, why aren’t we home?

SUSIE: This is the next destination that was programmed into the Professor’s time-travel plans.

KYLA: So, where are we?

EPILOGUE

SUSIE: Ah, hello there. This is SUSIE here. That stands for Supremely Upgraded Subspace Information Engine, but my friends just call me SUSIE. I need some help. For some reason, every time we timeslide to the Professor’s next destination, I lose some parts of my memory bank. It would be most helpful to Kyla, Eden and myself if you wouldn’t mind filling them in. All you need to do is answer the following questions.

Question 1.
What size was the glacier that formed Glencoe? Was it:
a) 5km 
b) 12km 
c) 25km

Question 2. 
What is an ice age? Is it:
a) a long period of time where the temperature of the Earth is much cooler
b) a short period of time where the temperature of the Earth is much warmer
c) the legal age for buying ice in shops

Last question now.
When did the settlers first make their homes in Scotland? Was it:
a) approximately 12,000 years ago
b) approximately 450 million years ago
c) 25 years ago

Thank you so much for helping me keep my system online. It means that I can help Kyla and Eden as they try to stop the dastardly Professor Curran.
I’ll see you next time!

Transcript

6 voices: SUSIE; Announcer; Kyla; Eden; Professor Curran; Thrace

Prologue

[Beeping noises]

SUSIE: Ah. Hello there. Good to see you. Now, for those of you who haven’t joined us before, you can catch up with the adventures of Kyla and Eden by listening to previous episodes of Timesliders. You can find out how they became heroic time-travellers and protectors of Scotland’s past, present, future and natural history. 

For those of you who don’t know me, my name is SUSIE. SUSIE is short for Supremely Upgraded Subspace Information Engine. But all my friends call me SUSIE. 

[Exciting adventure music]

I help Kyla and Eden as they try to stop the dastardly Professor Curran and their nincompoop assistant Thrace. If you’re listening to this, there is a very good chance that we’ll meet at some point in the future … or your past … or maybe we have met already and we just don’t know it yet. Time travel can be so complicated that even I don’t understand it, and I’m meant to know everything.

Anyway, I’m talking to you through a hole in subspace that can travel through time, but the hole is closing.
If you can still hear me, we’re travelling to … hello?

[Whooshing]

ANNOUNCER: And now, on Timesliders ...

Scene 1

EDEN: Wow! Look at that tower!  

KYLA: SUSIE, have you got any information for us?

SUSIE: I’m still collating all the data I can find, but we’re quite far back from where we were. I can tell you where we are, but not quite when we are, just yet.

KYLA: So, where are we?

SUSIE: We are currently looking up at the Tower of Drum.  

EDEN: The Tower of Drum?

SUSIE: Yes. In Aberdeenshire.

KYLA and EDEN: Aberdeenshire?

SUSIE: That’s right! Aberdeenshire is in the North East of Scotland and is full of cultural and natural history.

KYLA: Do you think we might be back in our own time?

SUSIE: I’m afraid not. You see, although my information-gathering sensors are struggling to find an accurate time in history, I can tell you that Drum Tower was built in the 13th century; the castle wasn’t added to it until 1619.

EDEN: Kyla, there’s no castle … it’s just the tower.

KYLA: That must mean that we’re somewhere between the 13th century when the tower was built and 1619.

SUSIE: Sorry I can’t be more help. Something’s messing with all my sensors. It’s almost as if … Oh dear.

EDEN: I don’t like the sound of that.

KYLA: Me neither. What’s wrong, SUSIE?

SUSIE: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

KYLA: SUSIE! What’s wrong?

SUSIE: Well, for some reason, where we are has an unusually large number of time gates floating around.

EDEN: Time gates? What are time gates?

SUSIE: Time gates are portals to other times that open randomly and can transport anyone who walks through them to another time.

EDEN: Oh. Well, that doesn’t sound too bad. We’re very used to time travel.

SUSIE: Yes. The problem is that there is no way of knowing when one of these gates will open, or where they’ll take you. You could end up in the past, present or future … anywhere in the universe.

KYLA: Anywhere in the universe?

SUSIE: I’m afraid so. There are a lot of them about, which is why my sensors are playing up. You had better stick close to each other, and I’ll do my best to warn you about any gates that open up nearby.

EDEN: Shhh! I think someone’s coming.

KYLA: Quick! Hide!

[Sounds of horses]

EDEN: Who are they? What are they wearing?

SUSIE: One of them appears to be Robert the Bruce.

EDEN: Who’s Robert Bruce?

KYLA: Not Robert Bruce; Robert the Bruce. Haven’t you learnt about him in school yet?

EDEN: No. Who’s Robert the Bruce?

KYLA: He was a very important Scottish king who lived a long time ago.

SUSIE: A very long time ago in fact. Robert the Bruce is arguably one of Scotland’s most influential historic figures. If Professor Curran were to do anything to Robert the Bruce, the course of Scottish history would change forever.

KYLA: That must be why we’re here then. The Professor must have a devious scheme that involves Robert the Bruce.

EDEN: I still don’t get why he’s important.

SUSIE: I’ve got some information about Robert the Bruce and his place in Scottish history if you’d like to hear it?

KYLA: Sorry, SUSIE, but I don’t think we’ve got time. 

SUSIE: Oh.

KYLA: The Professor and Thrace may already be here. We’ve got to protect Robert the Bruce. Maybe later.

EDEN: Um … Kyla, what’s that?

[Whooshing]

KYLA: What’s what?

[Squeaking gate]

SUSIE: Oh, dear me. That’s a time gate.

KYLA: We’ve got to get out of here.

EDEN: How?

SUSIE: We’re too late! There’s no time. Hold on! Time to timeslide!

KYLA, EDEN and SUSIE: Aaaaaaaargh!

[Whooshing]

Scene 2

[Whooshing]

THRACE: Aaaaaargh! That bit never gets any easier! When are we now, boss? It’s a bit dreich.

PROF. CURRAN: If I’ve got my calculations worked out correctly, we should have arrived on top of Drum Tower at a very specific point in 1323.

THRACE: Well, it looks like we’re on top of a tower. Oh, I really don’t like heights, boss.

PROF. CURRAN: Oh, shut up, Thrace. You’re scared of everything.

THRACE: I’m not scared of heights.

PROF. CURRAN: No?

THRACE: No! But I am scared of falling from them.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace?

THRACE: Shut up?

PROF. CURRAN: Well done.

THRACE: Thanks, boss. So, what are we doing in 1323? Is this part of Operation Stopwatch?

PROF. CURRAN: Of course it’s part of Operation Stopwatch. We’re here to change the course of Scottish history … forever.

THRACE: I know that. We’re always trying to change the course of Scottish history. I’m still not entirely sure why!

PROF. CURRAN: Because I said so!

THRACE: Fair enough. But how are we trying to do it this time?

PROF. CURRAN: Look down there.

THRACE: Where?

PROF. CURRAN: There! Now, tell me what you see. 
  
THRACE: There are some folk over there on horses; some other people around a fire. Uh, two men having a bit of a chat. Um, there’s some trees there. Oh, look! There’s a cute little bunny rabbit over there. Oh, look at him, hopping along ...

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace! Concentrate on the two men having a chat.

THRACE: Righto. Who are they? What do you think they’re chatting about?

PROF. CURRAN: One of them is Robert the Bruce.

THRACE: What about the other one?

PROF. CURRAN: That is a chap called William de Irwyn, also known as William Irvine, and he was one of Robert the Bruce’s closest allies.

THRACE: Oh, I see. Boss, what’s an ally?

PROF. CURRAN: (sighs) It’s like a close friend.

THRACE: Ohhh, like us!

PROF. CURRAN: (sighs) Can we just get back to William Irvine and Robert the Bruce?

THRACE: You got it!

PROF. CURRAN: You see those very heavy stones on the tower’s battlements?

THRACE: Yes.

PROF. CURRAN: Well, what do you think would happen if one of them were to land right on top of Robert the Bruce?

THRACE: He’d probably be known as Robert the Flat!

PROF. CURRAN: (sighs) Exactly. So, here’s a hammer and a chisel. Get one of those stones loose.

[Sound of chipping at stone]

Scene 3

[Playground sounds and then a warping noise]

KYLA: Eden?

EDEN: Yeah?

KYLA: Oh, thank goodness. Are you okay?

EDEN: I’m fine.

KYLA: SUSIE? Are you okay?

SUSIE: Yes. I’m fine, thank you.

EDEN: Look! Look at all these people.

KYLA: They look like they’re wearing …

EDEN: They’re wearing school uniforms. They’re kids, just like us. Are we … are we back home, like, in our own time?

SUSIE: I can tell you that we’re still at Drum Castle and it looks like we’re back in your original timeline. The time gate has brought you back to the same day and time that you first time-travelled from Culzean Castle at the beginning of your adventures.  

KYLA: That’s amazing!

EDEN: So, we can go home?!

SUSIE: Indeed.

KYLA: But how?

EDEN: We can just find someone and …

KYLA: And what? Tell them that we’re time-travellers? They’ll never believe us.

EDEN: We can show them SUSIE. Then they’ll believe us. Right, SUSIE?

SUSIE: I’m afraid that there’s a more urgent problem with the timeline. My sensors indicate that something is missing, something important, and it’s causing all sorts of problems.

KYLA: What sort of problems?

SUSIE: Whatever has been removed from the timeline is causing time gates to appear all over … all over Scotland! This is an incredibly dangerous place to be. All these children here, they could be swallowed up into a time gate and transported anywhere in the universe.

KYLA: And that could happen anywhere in Scotland?

SUSIE: It is happening. There are multiple reports of people just vanishing from existence.

EDEN: And there’s only one person we know who can be responsible for this.

Scene 4

[Sound of chipping at stone]

PROF. CURRAN: Have you finished yet, Thrace? It’s taking you forever to hammer through that.

THRACE: Sorry, boss. But if I remember rightly from my history lessons at school, this building stands the test of time for over 700 years.

PROF. CURRAN: So?

THRACE: Well, anything that’s built to last that long has to be pretty strong, doesn’t it?

[Chipping sounds]

THRACE: (sighs) All done. But boss …

PROF. CURRAN: What?

THRACE: I’m a bit worried that now I’ve chiselled the stone off, that it might not be very safe. I mean, look at that! It’s really loose. It could fall off and hit someone on the head.

PROF. CURRAN: That’s the whole point!

THRACE: Oh, I see!

PROF. CURRAN: All it takes now is a little push, and Robert the Bruce will become Robert the Pancake! Off you go.

THRACE: I’m not pushing it!

PROF. CURRAN: What? How dare you defy me!

THRACE: Sorry, boss. But I don’t want to be held responsible for flattening Robert the Bruce.

PROF. CURRAN: (sighs) Get out of the way. I’ll do it.

[Sound of stone being pushed off the tower and falling]

PROF. CURRAN: Argh!

THRACE: Don’t worry, boss. I’ve got you!

PROF. CURRAN: Don’t you dare let go! Pull me up!

THRACE: I’m trying, but boss, it’s very slippy.

[Squeaky gate and whirring noises]

PROF. CURRAN: If you let us fall, Thrace, I’ll throw you off the tower.

THRACE: I’m sorry, boss; I think we’re going to …

THRACE and PROF. CURRAN: Aaaaaarggh!

Scene 5

SUSIE: You two may want to step out of the way, very quickly!

[Heavy stone thumping]

EDEN: Argh! What was that?

KYLA: It nearly squashed us!

SUSIE: That came from 1323, where we’ve just come from. This is very bad news indeed. The time gates are so unstable; anything could come through at any time.

KYLA: We’ve got to fix it!

EDEN: But I want to go home!

KYLA: Eden, we won’t have a home to go to if we don’t stop these time gates from throwing things all over the universe.

EDEN: Fine! But we’re going to be in so much trouble if we don’t get back soon.

Epilogue

SUSIE: Ah. Hello there. SUSIE here. What a pickle Kyla and Eden are in! With the time gates, it’s going to make stopping Professor Curran and Thrace even more difficult.

In that episode we met a very important Scot – Robert the Bruce. Robert the Bruce was also known as Robert I and he was King of Scotland from 1306 to 1329. He is an incredibly important person in Scotland’s history and a name to listen out for.

Right, I can sense another time gate about to cause havoc with the timeline, so I must go. You’ll hear from me again soon! Bye for now.

Transcript

6 voices: SUSIE; Announcer; Kyla; Eden; Professor Curran; Thrace

Prologue

SUSIE: See, I told you that you’d hear from me again soon. Right, just a quick recap of what happened previously.

[Exciting adventure music]

Kyla and Eden have been sent hurtling through time after Professor Curran and Thrace to Drum Castle in Aberdeenshire, where time gates keep popping up and sending things through to other time periods. In fact, Kyla and Eden were nearly squashed by a stone from 1323. That could have been very messy.

We met Robert the Bruce, who gave Drum Castle to William Irvine. We’re not quite sure why the Professor and Thrace are so interested in Drum Castle, but Kyla and Eden are going to find out!

ANNOUNCER: And now, on Timesliders ...

Scene 1

PROF. CURRAN and THRACE: Aaaaaaargh!

[Thumping sound and sound of a person groaning]

THRACE: Well, that was very nice of this chap to break our fall. What happened, boss? I didn’t start up the time device. Did you?

PROF. CURRAN: No, I didn’t. We must have fallen through a time gate, landing on … whoever this is.

THRACE: What’s a time gate?

PROF. CURRAN: Even if I had the time to explain it to you, you wouldn’t understand.

[Birdsong]

THRACE: Fair enough. Where are we?

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace, look up there. What do you see?

THRACE: Uh, Drum Tower. Oh look, there’s a castle built onto it.

PROF. CURRAN: So, we’re obviously still at Drum Castle. Hand me the time device. 

[Bleeping]

PROF. CURRAN: We’ve landed in 1746.

THRACE: Well, now that you’ve said it, it’s obvious. But who’ve we landed on?

PROF. CURRAN: This looks like … oh yes, it’s Alexander Irvine, 17th Laird of Drum.

THRACE: Sounds important. (grunts)

PROF. CURRAN: For our purposes, Thrace, the 17th Laird is very important. We might not have been able to flatten Robert the Bruce, but now that we’re here, we could have some fun in Drum.

[Thrace grunts again]

PROF. CURRAN: For goodness’ sake, Thrace. What is the matter with you?

THRACE: There’s something poking in my ... there’s something poking my bum. Heehee, my bum is in Drum!

PROF. CURRAN: Don’t be an idiot.

THRACE: Sorry. But look, it’s a watch. Wow! It’s a nice one as well.

PROF. CURRAN: Quickly, put it in your pocket before the Laird wakes up. It might be worth something.

THRACE: (gasps]) But that’s stealing!

PROF. CURRAN: Yes. And?

THRACE: Stealing’s bad!

PROF. CURRAN: We are bad, Thrace! We do bad things.

THRACE: Oh yeah.

PROF. CURRAN: Right. Plan A may not have worked but it doesn’t mean that we can’t still change the course of Scottish history. Drum is a good place to cause havoc and remove some of the key people in my way. Come on, let’s get out of here before …

[Squeaking gate]

THRACE: Um, boss … I think it’s one of those time gate thingys. (echoes away)

Scene 2

KYLA: SUSIE, is there any way of finding out what we need to do to get rid of these time gates?

SUSIE: Time gates usually occur due to something being taken from one time period to another. It causes tears in the fabric of space and time. The only way to repair it is to return it to its rightful place and time.

EDEN: Like this stone that nearly killed us?

SUSIE: No. Simple objects like that don’t often cause problems. More complex objects, like things with moving parts, they can be very dangerous things to have out of time. 

[Whooshing and squeaking gate]

SUSIE: I’m detecting another time gate opening up. Watch out!

THRACE and PROF. CURRAN: Aaaaargh!

EDEN: You two!

KYLA: Have you any idea what you’ve done to the fabric of time and space?

THRACE: Oh hello, you two. Good to see you!

PROF. CURRAN: What year is this?

SUSIE: It’s the present day. We’ve arrived back in our original time.

PROF. CURRAN: Curses! We need to get back to 1323!

SUSIE: (whispers) I think I’ve identified the object that’s causing all the trouble. I believe that Thrace has a pocket watch that does not belong here.  

KYLA: (whispers) Would a pocket watch be enough to cause all this?

SUSIE: [whispers] Oh yes. Clocks and watches should never ever travel through time. It’s time within time within time … it gets very messy. I’m not even sure that my computer power would be enough to work it all out.

EDEN: Thrace?

THRACE: Hi there.

EDEN: Can we have a look at your new pocket watch?

THRACE: Yeah, of course you can.

EDEN: Thanks.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace! What are you doing, you fool?

KYLA: Quick, SUSIE, get us out of here!

[Whooshing]

THRACE: I’m really sorry, boss.

PROF. CURRAN: You don’t even know the meaning of the word ‘sorry’. But by the time I’m finished with you …

[Squeaking gate]

THRACE: Look out, boss! It’s another time thingy!

[Whooshing]

Scene 3

EDEN: Great. Back here again. Look, there’s Robert Bruce again.

SUSIE: I believe that I now know what the Professor and Thrace were up to.

KYLA: What were they trying to do this time?

SUSIE: The stone that nearly flattened you two was meant for Robert the Bruce. We know how important to Scottish history he was, and still is.

EDEN: But they failed. So, they’ll probably move on to the next dastardly scheme.

SUSIE: I wouldn’t be so sure. There’s plenty of damage that they could do to Scottish history at Drum.

KYLA: What do you mean?

SUSIE: Drum Castle and the Irvine family have seen over 700 years of Scottish history.

EDEN: 700 years?

KYLA: That’s a long time.

SUSIE:  Yes, and in those 700 years they were part of some of the most important events to take place in Scotland. I think that the Professor knows this and will try to mess with the timeline.

KYLA: Well, we’ve got to stop them.

EDEN: If we don’t, then anyone who visits Drum Castle could end up anywhere in time! Imagine the look on a teacher’s face if they came to Drum expecting a nice day out and came face-to-face with a woolly mammoth or a sabre tooth tiger.

SUSIE: Exactly. And it all starts here in 1323.

[Exciting adventure music]

KYLA: What’s so important about 1323?

SUSIE: This is when Robert the Bruce, King of Scotland gave William de Irwyn (or William Irvine as he came to be known) Drum Castle and the land around it. This is when William Irvine became the 1st Laird of Drum.

Epilogue

SUSIE: Ah, hello there. SUSIE here. I’m afraid that I’ve lost a few pieces of information, with all the back and forth between timelines. So, if you wouldn’t mind helping me out by answering these questions, I’ll be able to keep helping Kyla and Eden stop Professor Curran and Thrace from changing the course of Scottish history. Thank you!

Question 1. 
Who was Robert the Bruce? Was he: 
a. the 1st Laird of Drum
b. King of Scotland
c. a schoolteacher who got pulled through a time gate

Question 2. 
What did Thrace steal from Alexander Irvine, the 17th Laird of Drum? Was it: 
a. a pair of underpants
b. a large stone
c. a pocket watch

Question 3. 
How old is Drum Castle? Is it: 
a. over 700 years old
b. 23 years old
c. 500 years old

Thank you for helping me keep my systems up to date. I couldn’t do it without you. I’ll see you all next time!

Transcript

7 voices: SUSIE; Announcer; Kyla; Eden; Professor Curran; Thrace; EVIL SUSIE

Prologue

ANNOUNCER: Previously on Timesliders ...

SUSIE: We are currently looking up at the Tower of Drum. 

EDEN: The Tower of Drum?

SUSIE: Yes. In Aberdeenshire.

EDEN: Time gates? What are time gates?

SUSIE: Time gates are portals to other times that open randomly and can transport anyone who walks through them to another time. You could end up in the past, present or future, anywhere in the universe.

PROF. CURRAN: If I’ve got my calculations worked out correctly, we should have arrived on top of Drum Tower at a very specific point in 1323.

THRACE: So, what are we doing in 1323?

PROF. CURRAN: We’re here to change the course of Scottish history forever.

SUSIE: My sensors indicate that something is missing, something important, and it’s causing all sorts of problems.

KYLA: What sort of problems?

SUSIE: Whatever has been removed from the timeline is causing time gates to appear all over … all over Scotland! This is an incredibly dangerous place to be. All these children here, they could be swallowed up into a time gate and transported anywhere in the universe.

KYLA:  Would a pocket watch be enough to cause all this?

SUSIE: Oh, yes. Clocks and watches should never ever travel through time. It’s time within time within time … it gets very messy.

[Exciting adventure music]

KYLA: What’s so important about 1323?

SUSIE: This is when Robert the Bruce, King of Scotland, gave William de Irwyn (or William Irvine as he came to be known) Drum Castle and the land around it. This is when William Irvine became the first Laird of Drum. 

ANNOUNCER: And now, on Timesliders ...

Scene 1

[Sounds of howling wind and footsteps crunching in the snow]

THRACE: Boss. Is this … where are we?

[Clicking and beeping]

PROF. CURRAN: The time device says we’re at Drum Castle.

THRACE: But it’s falling to pieces! Look at all the walls. They’re crumbling down. This can’t be right.

PROF. CURRAN: A time gate has brought us back to Drum in the year 2224.

THRACE: This is the future?

PROF. CURRAN: It would appear so.

THRACE: What happened? Where have all the trees gone? Where’s the grass? There’s nothing left.

[Clicking and beeping]

PROF. CURRAN: Hang on. Hang on, I’m just checking the records. If I can just get this stupid thing to work ...

[Whooshing]

EVIL SUSIE: How may I be of assistance?

THRACE: What’s that?!

PROF. CURRAN: This is my little pet project that I’ve been working on in secret, ever since that goody-two-shoes duo stole SUSIE from us.

EVIL SUSIE: How may I be of assistance?

THRACE: Wow! What’s its name?

PROF. CURRAN: This is the Enhanced Virtual Intelligence Library of SUSIE.

THRACE: Sooo … EVIL SUSIE?

PROF. CURRAN: Oh, yes. I suppose EVIL SUSIE works well. What a lucky coincidence.

THRACE: Yeah, that worked out well.

EVIL SUSIE: How may I be of assistance?

PROF. CURRAN: Right, let’s see if this thing works. EVIL SUSIE, is Thrace unbelievably stupid?

EVIL SUSIE: Yes. Thrace is unbelievably stupid.

THRACE: This thing is brilliant. It’s right! I am unbelievably stupid. 

PROF. CURRAN: EVIL SUSIE, what’s going on? Where has Drum Castle gone? What’s happened to the landscape? This place is a mess.

EVIL SUSIE: Processing request. 

[Beeping]

EVIL SUSIE: We have arrived in the year 2224. In this timeline, Alexander Irvine, the 17th Laird of Drum was caught after the Battle of Culloden in 1746. He was knocked unconscious as he was walking around the grounds of the house and therefore not able to make his escape. He was put on trial for treason, found guilty and executed.

THRACE: Oh dear.

EVIL SUSIE: Oh dear indeed. Following the execution of the Laird, the family fell into financial difficulty. With no heirs to take over the estate, the Laird’s sister, Mary Irvine, did not embark on her project of planting woodland thereby conserving the natural heritage of the area. Soil erosion, loss of natural habitat and 20th- and 21st-century impacts on climate change all contributed to the gradual destruction of the landscape and any life that existed here. As the grounds were not able to sustain life, no one wanted to live in the castle, and it was left to crumble into the state you see now. There was nothing left for the National Trust for Scotland to look after.

THRACE: That’s very depressing.

EVIL SUSIE: Depressing indeed.

THRACE: Who knew that planting trees would be so important?

EVIL SUSIE: Trees are vital to maintain a healthy world climate and ecosystem. They contribute oxygen to the atmosphere, and provide shelter and habitats to wildlife. Without them, the world will end up … well, like this.

THRACE: Boss? I think it was us.

PROF. CURRAN: What was?

THRACE: I think we’re the ones who knocked Alexander Irvine, 17th Laird of Drum, unconscious. We landed on him when we fell through the time gate, right before I took the watch. Remember?

PROF. CURRAN: Ah.

THRACE: Boss, can I ask you something?

PROF. CURRAN: What is it, Thrace?

THRACE: Well, you know that we’re trying to change the course of Scotland’s history …

PROF. CURRAN: Yes.

THRACE: ... so that you can rule over Scotland forever.

PROF. CURRAN: Yes.

THRACE: Well, my question, if it’s not too much bother, you know, if you don’t mind me asking, but I understand if it’s too much …

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace!

THRACE: Well, what’s the point in ruling over this? There’s nothing here. It’s a complete wasteland. Is it really worth all the trouble of changing the course of history for this?

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace, for once, and only once in your miserable life, you’re right.

THRACE: Am I?

PROF. CURRAN: You are.

THRACE: But if I’m right, does that mean … ?

PROF. CURRAN: Yes, Thrace. It means we have to undo our mistake. It means we’re going to have to ask for the help of … I can’t believe I’m going to say this … those children. EVIL SUSIE!

EVIL SUSIE: How may I be of assistance?

PROF. CURRAN: I need you to locate Kyla and Eden in the timeline, and take us to wherever and whenever they might be.

EVIL SUSIE: Processing. Kyla and Eden located. Starting time device.

[Whooshing]

Scene 2

KYLA: So, we’ve stopped the Professor and Thrace from flattening Robert the Bruce, but we’ve still got to get the pocket watch back to the Laird of Drum to stop all these time gates from opening up.

EDEN: How did they get hold of the watch in the first place?

SUSIE: They must have slipped through the time gate and come across the Laird by accident, but … oh dear …

KYLA: What is it?

SUSIE: Do you notice anything about Drum?

EDEN: It’s very quiet.

KYLA: Where is everybody? What year is it?

SUSIE: We’ve arrived in 1763.

KYLA: So, no school visits then?

EDEN: Or tourists?

SUSIE: No … but it should be busier than this. We should be seeing people who work on the estate, and hearing the noise of birds and animals that call Drum their home.

KYLA: It’s deserted.

SUSIE: We’ve arrived in a timeline where the 17th Laird of Drum, Alexander Irvine, was caught by the Redcoats after the Battle of Culloden. The Redcoats were Government soldiers who fought against the Jacobites. In this timeline the 17th Laird, Alexander, was captured by the Redcoats and … well … things didn’t end very well for him, and it meant that the Irvine family abandoned Drum Castle.

KYLA: They just left?

SUSIE: In this timeline, they faced financial ruin, which meant that Mary Irvine, Alexander’s sister, never planted the extensive woodland. Look around. What do you notice?

EDEN: No trees! They’ve all been cut down.

SUSIE: That’s right. And without the important work that Mary Irvine did to plant the trees and protect nature, Drum will become a wasteland.

EDEN: That’s awful.

SUSIE: It is. Oh, I’m picking up some temporal activity.

EDEN: What?

SUSIE: I think we’re about to get visitors from another time.

KYLA: It better not be another huge stone about to land on us.

SUSIE: No, this is from a time machine.

[Whooshing]

KYLA: Well, I guess that it’s you two that are responsible for Drum being deserted like this?  

PROF. CURRAN: Before you get on your high horse, I’m here to call a … to call a truce.

KYLA: Ha! I don’t believe that!

EDEN: No way! A truce, with you two?

PROF. CURRAN: I don’t like the idea any more than you do. But I’ve seen what happens to Drum in a few hundred years’ time if Mary Irvine doesn’t plant her trees.

THRACE: Trust me, it’s not pretty.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace is right.

THRACE: Again?!

PROF. CURRAN: I’ve no intention of ruling over a desolate wasteland, so we’ve got to make sure that Alexander Irvine is not caught after the Battle of Culloden. We’ve got to make sure that he’s hidden by his sister Mary.

EDEN: What’s the Battle of Culloden?

SUSIE: It’s another very important moment in Scotland’s history and involved the Jacobite army. I’ve got plenty of information on that, but I’m not sure that now is the time to go into it in detail.  

KYLA: Thanks, SUSIE. We’ll come back to that one later.

SUSIE: The important thing from Drum’s point of view is that Alexander Irvine was at the battle but escaped soon afterwards, with the help of his sister Mary. After his exile, he was able to return to Drum; and his sister Mary began planting trees and conserving the natural world.  

PROF. CURRAN: Urrghhh! The important thing is that we’ve got to stop Alexander from being captured.

EDEN: How was he captured?

THRACE: We may have landed on him.

KYLA: Landed on him?!

THRACE: It wasn’t our fault. We fell through one of those time gate thingys when we were trying to flatten Robert the Bruce.

EDEN: You two are just awful.

PROF. CURRAN: Yes, yes, yes. Will you help us or not?

KYLA: (whispers) If we don’t help them, then Drum is doomed.

EDEN: (whispers) Yeah, but if we do help them, we’re … you know … helping the bad guys.

KYLA: (whispers) We can’t let Drum become a desolate wasteland. Think of all the people back in our time that would never get to see it.

SUSIE: And there will always be other opportunities to stop that dastardly pair.  

KYLA: (whispers) SUSIE’s right. We can deal with them another time. We need to make sure that Drum is preserved for the future.

EDEN: (whispers) You mean our present?

KYLA: (whispers) Uh, oh, yeah. That’s right.

EDEN: Okay, we’ll help you. But we don’t trust you.

PROF. CURRAN: Suits me!

KYLA: So, what’s the plan?

PROF. CURRAN: You need to go back in time to just before we fell on top of Alexander Irvine, and hide him from the Redcoats. It’s the only way he will survive.

KYLA: We’ll also be giving him back his pocket watch while we’re there, to put a stop to all of these time gates that keep opening up.

PROF CURRAN: Fine.

THRACE: Oh, I really liked that watch.

PROF. CURRAN: Thrace ...

THRACE: I know, I know … shut up.

[Squeaking gate]

SUSIE: We better get going. There are a lot of time gates starting to appear. In fact, here comes one now.

PROF. CURRAN: Oh no! Thrace, hold on.

[Whooshing]

PROF. CURRAN and THRACE: Argh!

KYLA: Well, that should keep them out of our hair for a bit.

EDEN: SUSIE, take us to 1746, just before Alexander Irvine was about to be captured.

SUSIE: Absolutely.

[Whooshing]

Epilogue

SUSIE: Hello there. SUSIE here. Professor Curran and Thrace saw something terrifying: a future with no trees!

I’m no fan of EVIL SUSIE, but they were right when they said that trees are vital to maintaining a healthy planet. What a terrible state things will be in if we don’t fix the timeline. Such a terrible state that Kyla and Eden have to team up with the Professor and Thrace to put things right.

I must be off. Kyla and Eden will be needing my help again very soon, and I’m sure I’ll be needing yours as well. You’ll hear from me again soon! Bye for now.

Transcript

9 voices: SUSIE; Announcer; Kyla; Eden; Alexander Irvine; Mary Irvine; Professor Curran; Thrace; Evil SUSIE

Prologue

[Beeping]

SUSIE: SUSIE here again! Now, what happened last time? Oh yes, that’s right.

The Professor and Thrace got a nasty shock when they saw what the future was like with no trees around Drum Castle. It was bleak and desolate, and the castle had been abandoned. Kyla and Eden agreed to work with Professor Curran and Thrace to make sure that such a terrible future doesn’t happen. I can hardly believe it myself!

[Exciting adventure music]

ANNOUNCER: And now, on Timesliders ...

Scene 1

[Whooshing and then crunching footsteps]

SUSIE: We have arrived, and just in time! We still have a chance to save Alexander Irvine from being captured by the Redcoats.

EDEN: That must be him. Excuse me, Mr ... Mr Irvine?

KYLA: Eden! He’s a laird. You can’t call him Mr!

EDEN: What should I call him?

KYLA: Oh, um, I don’t really know. Um, Sir? Sir!

ALEXANDER IRVINE: What on earth? Where did you two come from? What clothes are these? Spies are you? Sent to capture me?

KYLA: No! I promise you we’re not spies. But we do know that there are people coming for you. We’re here to warn you and try to keep you safe.

ALEXANDER IRVINE: What strange creatures to come to my rescue! I had suspected that the Redcoats would be coming for me.

EDEN: They will be, and very soon Mr … um, Laird ... um …

KYLA: We must get you into the tower. It’s where you’re meant to hide.

ALEXANDER: How do I know you’re honest and true?

EDEN: Um, it’s a good point. This all must seem a bit weird. Okay, you have a sister …

KYLA: Oh yes, a sister called Mary.

EDEN: And she is super into planting trees and keeping the wood going.

ALEXANDER: Aye. That she is.

KYLA: We wouldn’t know that unless we were here to help you. So, please trust us. You’ve got to hide somewhere in the tower.

ALEXANDER: As you wish. I know just the place.

EDEN: Thank you.

[Footsteps and then a heavy door closing]

KYLA: Phew! Just in time. Look, there’s Professor Curran and Thrace.

[Thumping noise as Prof. Curran and Thrace land]

EDEN: It was worth travelling back in time, just to see those two fall out of the sky like that!

KYLA: Keep SUSIE hidden. We don’t want to scare his Lairdship more than we already have.

Scene 2

KYLA: Can’t tell you too much, Sir, but if Drum is to survive in the future, you must survive today.

ALEXANDER: I’m not sure hiding means I will survive.

EDEN: You will. The Redcoats will come for you, but your sister Mary will make them believe that you’ve already left. Then, in a couple of years, you can come back to Drum.

ALEXANDER: How you know such things is beyond me.

EDEN: It’s all a bit beyond us as well, to be honest.

KYLA: (whispers) Shhh! They’re searching for you. I can hear them.

[Footsteps]

EDEN: (whispers) How long do we have to stay in here?

ALEXANDER: Until my sister Mary comes for us. Only then will we know it’s safe.

EDEN: Then you must get out of Scotland. The further away, the better. Somewhere like France ... or Spain? They won’t stop looking for you.

KYLA: I think I can hear them leaving. We’ll stay here until Mary comes for us.

[Sound of snoring]

EDEN: It’s a good job they’re leaving. He’d definitely give us away.

KYLA: SUSIE, how’s the timeline looking?

SUSIE: Much better. The Irvine family will remain at Drum. Mary will get to do her important work planting trees here, and the National Trust for Scotland will keep that important work going back in our timeline.

KYLA: Great news!

SUSIE: May I suggest that we use this opportunity to time travel out of here, while Alexander is still sleeping. He may well believe that seeing you two was just a strange dream if we leave now.

KYLA: That’s a good idea. Eden, leave the watch with him. We don’t want any more time gates causing us problems. Where are we going, SUSIE?

SUSIE: I think I’ve got just the place. Get ready to timeslide again!

[Whooshing]

Scene 3

[Whooshing and sound of birdsong]

SUSIE: We’re back at Drum, 1763.

KYLA: Wow! It looks completely different.

EDEN: The plan worked?

SUSIE: The plan worked. We stopped Alexander Irvine being captured by the Redcoats, which meant that the Irvine family were able to return to Drum Castle and Mary Irvine was able to continue her very important work.

MARY: Good day.

KYLA: Oh! Hello, Mrs …

MARY: Miss. Miss Mary Irvine. And you are?

KYLA: I’m Kyla and this is Eden.

EDEN: Hello!

MARY: Well, Kyla and Eden. What, may I ask, are you doing here?

KYLA: Um …

EDEN: Um … trees.

MARY: Trees?

KYLA: Trees? Oh! Yes, trees.

EDEN: We’ve heard all about the work you’re doing here to plant trees and look after the natural habitat. We wanted to come and see it for ourselves.

MARY: Well, that is as good a reason as any to trespass on my family’s estate, I suppose. Follow me.

KYLA: Why?

MARY: You want to see the work I’ve been doing?

KYLA: Oh, yes.

MARY: Then I will show you.

Scene 4

[Footsteps in the forest and birdsong]

MARY: Trees are incredible things. They give so much and take very little in return.

KYLA: You planted all of these?

MARY: A lot of them, yes. Some I will get to see grow to maturity, but most … well, I’ll be long gone before they are fully grown.

EDEN: So, why do you plant them then?

MARY: For the future.

KYLA: The future?

MARY: Yes. The trees we plant today will take care of those who come after us. They provide shelter, wood, homes. They can stand watch for hundreds and hundreds of years, acting as guardians over the land.

EDEN: They’re like time-travellers!

MARY: (laughs) Good heavens! What a ridiculous notion, child! But yes, I suppose if such a thing were possible, then they would be. Well, you must excuse me. I have business to attend to. My nephew needs counsel on a number of matters. Stay and play if you wish, but do no harm to the trees and the plants.

KYLA: Her nephew?

SUSIE: The current Laird of Drum. Mary continued her work here, even after the death of her brother a couple of years ago.

EDEN: So, the timeline is back to normal?

SUSIE: For now, yes. But it is important that the work that was started here continues. People across Scotland can make a difference, whatever time period they’re from. We can all help by reducing the amount of energy we consume; walking or cycling rather than driving; and making sure we recycle. Even I have a low energy mode to help reduce my carbon footprint.

KYLA: That sounds like something we can all do. So, where are we heading to next?

EDEN: Home?

SUSIE: Unfortunately, I am detecting other changes in a different part of Scotland’s history.

EDEN: I wonder who could be responsible for that?

KYLA: I’ll give you three guesses.

EDEN: That means we don’t get to go home?

[Exciting adventure music]

KYLA: While the Professor and Thrace are still out there, we must do whatever we can to stop them playing with Scotland’s past, present and future. Otherwise, we may not have a home to go back to.

EDEN: SUSIE, let’s get going.

SUSIE: Certainly! Hold on … who knows where we’ll end up next!

[Whooshing]

Epilogue

SUSIE: Well, we managed to keep Drum Castle and the woodland from turning into a desolate wasteland. But there’s still a lot of work to maintain the woodland and make sure that the castle doesn’t fall down. Luckily, the National Trust for Scotland is on the case. 

Now that there’s an EVIL SUSIE out there, it’s even more important for me to keep my data banks up to date. Could you help me fill in the blanks again?

Question 1. 
What was the battle that Alexander Irvine escaped from in 1746? Was it: 
a. The Battle of Bannockburn
b. The Battle of Dunbar
c. The Battle of Culloden

Question 2.
What was the name of Alexander Irvine’s sister? Was it: 
a. Mary
b. Morag 
c. Michelle

Question 3.
Why was the planting of trees so important at Drum? Was it: 
a. Because trees are a good source of wood to build fires. 
b. Because the Irvine family enjoyed building treehouses to hide in after battles. 
c. Because trees help protect the natural environment, and provide habitats and shelter for animals.

Thank you for helping me to keep my systems up to date. I’m sure that we’ll all see each other very soon.

And if you’re ever at Drum Castle, be on the lookout for any changes in the timeline, and watch out for those time gates! There could still be a few flying around and you never know where you’re going to end up! Bye!